Monday, October 26, 2009

Negativity and Anger

I am a negative person, I will be the first to admit that. I will also admit that I'm not a happy person. But when I complain about something that has angered me or whatever, 98% of the time its something OUT OF MY CONTROL. For example, there has been a lot of trash talk and lying when it comes to me. OUT OF MY CONTROL. I can't stop it. And even though there is nothing I can do about it it doesn't mean I have to like it or even just sit back and accept it. I will get angry. I won't be happy. Anger is a natural emotion. If you're able to just move on then more power to you. But I'M not you. We're not the same. I'm sure there are plenty of things you do that I feel is stupid, or tiring, not necessary, annoying, whatever, but if that's how you deal then who am I to say anything about it? I can't expect people to feel the same as me, think the same way, cope the same, act the same. Anything. I'm open minded enough to know everyone deals differently and NOT complain or think twice about how they go about doing it. I've also leaned not to say things to the extreme like "She ALWAYS does this" or "He NEVER says that" because always and never are generally not accurate. I'm not ALWAYS negative, probably more than most people but it's not something I'm always going on about. I'm also not ALWAYS mad. If that were true you would hear NOTHING from be but pure anger and negativity.

Yes there is a lot of complaints from me on MY BLOG but its because its MY BLOG and I use it to VENT. If you don't like it LEAVE. But if you look at something I'm on on a daily basis that has daily updates you will notice that LESS THAN HALF of them are negative or angry. Less than a quarter actually. But whatever. Keep thinking negatively of me and judge me. Do whatever you want because I know how I really am, those who I care about most know who I truly am and that's all that matters.

Monday, October 5, 2009

Only I know how I feel

It's very rare for me to actually open up to a person about anything. And even if I were to share how I feel no one but myself can know for sure how I feel. It could seem like something simple, or not a big deal but still, no one knows except for me. So for someone to tell me I can or can't do something or that I should, you're really in no position to tell me anything when you really have no idea.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Just because I shouldn't let something bother me doesn't mean I should just sit back and take it.

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Why do people always have to give their "2 cents" when it comes to how a person feels? Ok, if they ask your opinion or for some advice, or you know the other side of the story then ok fine. But if you have no freakin idea why they're feeling a certain way how can you say ANYTHING?! If you know NOTHING how can you say ANYTHING?!!?!? UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, September 14, 2009

Just because...

Just because you're 18 and LEGALLY an adult it doesn't mean you are MENTALLY.

Just because you can do something, it doesn't mean you should.

Just because you think you know everything, it doesn't mean you do.

Just because you think nobody has been where you are, it doesn't mean you're right.

Just because you're not forced to deal with something today, it doesn't mean you should ignore it.

Just because your parents are driving you crazy, it doesn't mean you should run away.

Just because you have restrictions that you don't agree with, it doesn't mean to rebel.

Just because you think you'll get your happily ever after, it doesn't mean you will.

Running away from one problem and jumping into something else too quickly when you're not ready does not mean all your problems will go away. Things will be much harder for you. You're setting yourself up for disaster and heartache. If someone has been where you are, LEARN FROM THEIR EXPERIENCE.

Thursday, September 3, 2009


I don't know what it is but I'm really bugged by this. Maybe it's because I'm completely fed up with people always just jumping to conclusions, maybe not. But whatever the reason is it doesn't change the fact that it's frustrating to deal with.

When someone makes a statement, without giving ALL the details as to why they feel or think that way (because it would take too long to go through) why do other people just assume something negative or a flaw in their thinking without trying to find out WHY they are making that statement in the first place? Making it seem like that person (again, assuming) didn't think things through or try to see all sides before verbalizing their opinion.

What is with people just assuming or coming to their own conclusions without trying to find out all the facts first?

It needs to stop because one of these days I will probably end up just blowing up on whoever is doing that and putting them in their place for not using their brain.

Monday, July 13, 2009

Stop Talking Trash!

I'm so sick and tired of people always talking trash about others when they DON'T KNOW THE WHOLE STORY, when they DON'T KNOW WHATS GOING ON, when they DON'T EVEN BOTHER TRYING TO LOOK AT THE WHOLE PICTURE, when they JUST ASSUME THEY KNOW, etc etc etc.

Who are any of you to judge someone else?! Do you know what kind of problems we're faced with? No. Do you know our limitations? No. Do you see what we do all day long? No. So why do you act like you actually know WHEN YOU HAVE NO IDEA?!

Maybe you all should SHUT UP, stop focusing on others and FOCUS ON YOURSELF because obviously you need some work if you're going to be this judgmental! Or maybe it's because you're so pathetic and have no life that it makes you feel better about yourself to look at other people and point out the flaws you THINK they have.

Until you're perfect, you have NO BUSINESS talking trash about someone else. ESPECIALLY when all it is is an assumption and NOT FACT!

You people are supposed to be loving and up building but all you do is tear others down and are self righteous. Stop thinking the worst in people. You don't talk to us, you talk to others or make your own conclusions which are ALWAYS INCORRECT. You judge us for things you think you know, but you're the ones doing something much worse. Get off your high horse before you get knocked off, because it will happen one of these days and the only person you'll have to blame is yourself.

You know, I see things myself and could easily come to my own conclusion as to whats going on. But the reality is, I DON'T KNOW and whatever it is is THEIR BUSINESS not mine. I don't think the worst in them. I'm imperfect and it's not my place to speak negatively, spread lies, gossip, and talk trash about ANYONE.

And I do know for A FACT that people spread lies about us. How? Well for starters someone informed us that a certain someone that is supposed to be close to us is basically a "spy" to someone close to them. And because I've heard it first hand.

Only God can judge us and he'll do the same to you.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

It's just one thing after another

It amazes me how you can be going through so many negative things all at once that you're stressed and maybe even depressed out of your mind for what may seem like forever, then finally a glimpse of hope appears. Things seem to be getting better and the feeling of stress is replaced with the feeling of relief. Then all of a sudden everything changes once again. Not only are you back to where you started, but its worse than before and you just can't believe how things manage to constantly go wrong.

With all the things I'm forced to deal with on a daily basis, I'm surprised I haven't done certain things so many others do in these types of situations. I guess it's because I know doing those things won't make anything better. That's logic for you.

What good is logic when you're miserable though.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009


I know a lot of things bother or annoy me. But there are just some things I cannot stand. One of those being, people insulting a culture that is not their own.

I realize there are a lot of things in other cultures that not all people will agree with, but for someone not of that culture to insult it just because they don't agree with it or like it is COMPLETELY IGNORANT. It's one thing not to like something, but who is anyone not directly associated to that culture in the position to make any kind of negative remark about those who do live that way?

People need to understand that THEY may not agree with a certain aspect of one's culture, BUT, those who are apart of that culture or are surrounded by it, its a way of life for them.

The reason I bring this up is because recently I came across an "online group" that is basically a "hate club" for something I'm interested in. I don't care if anyone hates something that I love to do. What I do care about though is their ignorance towards it and people who do it.

Poi Balls, which is a ball on a long piece of string that is swung around in different motions. (done with 2 or more at a time) It's a performance art from the Maori people of New Zealand. IT'S A PART OF THEIR CULTURE, yet the people in that hate group say people who do it are losers, should get a hobby or a job, are only trying to show off, etc etc etc. I'm sure there are those who do do it only to show off and try to impress others. But for people like me and people of that culture, they do it because they have respect and appreciation FOR THAT CULTURE.

You don't have to like it, or anything else for that matter, but no one is in any position to insult or critizise something of another culture. You people need to get over yourselves because you know what, I'm sure there are things you do too that others find to be stupid. You're not that great so just shut up.

Oh and by the way, I rather be a loser than an ignorant fool.

I don't do it JUST to do it. I actually preform as apart of Polynesian entertainment.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

I need peace

I know things almost never go according to plan. That's fine. I can work with that. But why is it that it seems like NOTHING has gone right for me these past few years? Seriously, I can think of maybe a handful of good things in my life that basically mean squat because everything else gets screwed up in one way or another. These good things are meaningless if those other things don't work out. I'm so sick of just trying to be hopeful but end up being completely disappointed all over again. I'm so sick of the same thing going wrong time after time. I'm so sick of people treating me like crap and making me feel like I'm not even wanted. I'm so sick of everything just being a let down.

These things aren't even in my control which makes it that much more frustrating. I have to just deal with it and hope it doesn't push me over the edge. I have to keep everything locked up inside of me because I have no where to let it all out, and even I did it wouldn't change the fact that everything still goes wrong!

I need some things to start going right very soon otherwise I know I will have a mental break down and just crack.

After years and years of stress and disappointment I can feel the anger and sadness building up inside me. My chest hurts, I'm anxious, I panic, and I already have difficulty breathing properly. If you only knew what I was feeling inside I can guarantee you would almost loose the will to live. I say almost because I'm not there quite yet since I'm still able to manage some kind of hopefulness.

Don't let my smile fool you. Smiling doesn't equal happiness.